We spend our lives expecting too much from too many people. Underestimating friendship, over estimating relationships. Caught up in the struggle of attaining greater meanings from simple sentences, other times standing oblivious to words that actually create a difference.

We blame others, blame events for mistakes that we ourselves chose to make. All the time, testing the fine line of our limitations, consciously aware of the consequences yet still when the ground hits us, “unexpected” is what we preferably consider the fall to be.

We fail to express ourselves in moments when emotion is all that could have created us. Digesting in all the questions the mind burst with, keeping the grieving tears inside when the heart wants to pour them out, portraying the equilibrium of our emotions when the inside breaks with every loss, every word into shards too subtle to be able to glue back again.

Unaware of how we simultaneously continue to waste the time of our lives sheltering our feelings from the world. We outgrow from guilt to show our self-control, resisting the tide of our sentiments to take over us. Reconciling ourselves each night, putting up makeup to hide the eyes that have had sleepless nights crying in the pillow, to show the indifference we feel towards the worldly disappointments and rejections received.

Likewise not just disposing the blessing of being able to feel certain emotions, we also drag in those who we love shutting them into the castle of our self-made illusion; empty and dark. Depriving them of the warmth they deserve to receive. For example, the fear for showing passion for those we love. When love itself is desperation, obsession with someone’s soul, than why do we restrain ourselves from delivering the affection with the fear of being categorized as desperate?

With so less to offer we demand others to give us more of them. Expecting them to co-operate when we ourselves have weakly grasped the strings that tie us altogether. Aspiring for more than one’s abilities with little or nothing at all to return, Is this how we commit justice? With our self and those connected?

Set free from the unwanted chains you have tied yourself with. Let that strong guard you have built around you drop. I do not ask much of you, but the world deserves a feedback of its interaction with you. Maybe it is not too good enough to be expressed but then it’s never too bad enough to be kept inside. Let those you love, and those who love you permit a little piece of your mind, your heart and see how magical all will be. Life isn’t as hard as it seems to be, we’ve made it hard ourselves, the world isn’t cruel as long as we’re careful in choosing the people we relate too. Allow those who you do choose to see how you feel about them.  You yourself deserve to express what you feel and live a little openly, to be happy and to spread happiness. Just like that.

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3 thoughts on “The Reluctance to give

  1. Love what you wrote. All of it. Eloquent. Your words broke my heart open. Leave regret behind. Love with abandon. Choose carefully, but be willing to love when it will not be returned. How can love be the wrong choice? Wonderful.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This is very cathartic…felt like waking up to a golden morning…discovering yet another beautiful day of our lives. Yes, life is quite simple, but we tend to find the simpler things hard to deal with. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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